Category: Uncategorized

Modern Varric Aesthetics:

dimir-charmer:

-lovingly cared for laptop, no longer any recognizable brand but an amalgam of new and improved parts
-starts wearing his fall jacket too early, doesn’t switch to his winter one until he risks losing fingers
-likes every picture his friends ever post on Facebook, Instagram.
-always carries a deck of cards
-window down, arm out the side of the car, sleeves rolled up radio blaring
-170, 638 unread emails, replies to text messages 5 min later or less
-raucous laughter at bars, always orders nachos for the table, knows every bar with a karaoke night in the city
-profile picture showing just his jawline and chest hair
-40% tipper
-sunglasses tucked into his shirt or pushed up onto his forehead, constantly using his hand to shade his eyes
-orders cheapest beer on the menu by the pitcher, complains about it all night
-YouTube channel on which he reads trashy romance novels in increasingly overdramatic voices
-wears/displays gag gifts proudly, owns 5+ ‘my best friend went to _____ and all I got was this lousy T-shirt’ shirts.
-books strewn over every horizon lay surface in his house, propping up furniture, uses a hardcover as a doorstop
-sprawls over entire table at coffee shops, pages of manuscript everywhere and red ink on his fingers
-sends ‘I love you man’ texts when drunk

afearreservedfordragons:

Idea of the day:

Alistair and a non-human noble Warden are a couple until he becomes King. Since this Warden can’t become Queen (or Co-King if you wanna go that route) and neither is looking for the mistress option, they break up. And they’re both upset about it, but after the day is saved and a year has passed, they go back to being the best of friends. Exchanging letters.

Years pass. They grow. The Warden is the king’s closest friend and advisor. Rumors abound. And while they aren’t true, both the Warden and Alistair have fallen in love with each other again, 8 years later, older and wiser. And neither acts on it because they’re both too scared.

10 years pass. Both are lovesick. Alistair tells himself he’ll tell the Warden he loves them when they get back from their quest to cure the Calling. He doesn’t care about having a mistress now; he’s lived in a marriage of connivance long enough to understand it. 

Alistair gets a letter. The Warden is coming to visit. Just as soon as they solve a question about the missing Wardens in Orlais. 

The next day a rift opens in the sky. 

The Warden is Hawke’s ally.

Have fun kids.

https://www.tumblr.com/audio_file/wolfboydeluxe/139387870563/tumblr_mu7cndwVuf1qidyw2?plead=please-dont-download-this-or-our-lawyers-wont-let-us-host-audio
http://wolfboydeluxe.tumblr.com/post/139387870563/audio_player_iframe/wolfboydeluxe/tumblr_mu7cndwVuf1qidyw2?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Faudio_file%2Fwolfboydeluxe%2F139387870563%2Ftumblr_mu7cndwVuf1qidyw2

adamdouglasdriver:

Diane Young | Vampire Weekend

whoopsrobots:

auroralynches:

into-the-weeds:

liberty-flight:

I’m reading up on chocolate frog cards in the Harry Potter universe, for reasons, and-

“Came up with the ever changing floor plan.” 

Really, Ravenclaw? Really?

“You know what this school needs? To not make any sense-”

“Rowena, I don’t think-”

“Exactly, you don’t think. I’m brilliant and this is perfect. Moving staircases, walls that think they’re doors-”

“But how will the students get to class?”

“They’ll have to figure it out.”

“…”

“Everyday. They will figure it out everyday. My students will live in a tower and navigate these stairs every time.”

“The stairs move! This doesn’t seem safe…I think I’ll put my common room in the basement, Rowena.”

“Ditto. I think the dungeons would be safer…”

“…My kids will brave these stairs. I’ll take the other tower.”

#Rowena snipes that ‘cunning’ means Salazar’s students should be able to handle the moving architecture#Salazar snipes back that ‘cunning’ means knowing when and how to avoid unnecessary bullshit#meanwhile Godric is just yelling PARKOUR! and Rowena is all That’s Not What I Meant#Helga would like her students to make it to class on time and without any broken bones#ninety percent of the reliable secret passages were a team effort by Helga and one of the others#to make sure the house elves could get around all right (via @mzminola)

#i feel like the collaboration was probably hufflepuff and slytherin#in the only time they ever worked together#helga: students and house elves can move safely!#salazar: more places to hide snakes#salazar is like we should make these accessible to people with no legs#helga is like i mean i agree but why are you being so nice about this#salazar is like no reason hey I’m just gonna make some of these rely on snake language for fun#do you think a fifty foot snake would fit in this passage asking for a friend (via @dinosauriaawesome)

i’m literally crying this is 100% what happened

(hey tumblr please don’t delete the previous people’s comments like you did the last time i added someone’s tags to a post mmkay)

No but that’s actually so clever okay like the people who live in the castle would get a general idea of the patterns and how to move around efficiently but like for anyone planning on attacking it would be impossible to infiltrate like how the hell do I attack the headmaster when I can’t even find the bathroom why the fuck am I in a chemistry supply closet okay these stairs went to the main hall but now I’m on my way to the broom closets holy fucking shit fuck leonard SAID the dorm was on the left of the three headed hippogriff but I’m here and it’s just a painting of a man with a donkey face is this a fucikgin joke leonard do you think this is funny because it’snot. its not okay siri how the hell do i get to the nearest anything “here is: the nearest painting” like fuck you siri