how to radically improve ur experience on tumblr.com:
mercilessly block all Fuckers. do not reply to them, do not “justify” blocking them. the goal is to get them out of ur life, not “win” a conflict
unfollow anyone who isnt actively improving ur quality of life. u dont owe the people u follow ur attention. if they arent producing content/posts that your benefit from in some way, u dont have to stick around. its not personal.
u dont have to care at maximum capacity about everything. ppl like to signal boost and spread awareness and thats great, but its ok to just not have the energy to do that. u dont have to feel guilty about using ur blog for YOUR purposes. thats what its for
if u need to, turn anon off. theres no shame in that. it works.
if someone is raising a concern with you or reacting critically to something youve said or done, listen to them with empathy rather than getting angry. not everyone is trying to start a fight when they call u out on doing something hurtful, and if u react angrily on a knee-jerk reaction to someone who was just trying to help, ur gonna look like an asshat
if u feel like ur about to look like an asshat, its advisable to get up and do something else for a while until youve cooled down and can think rationally. u dont have to reply right away
“tone” is pretty subjective, so try not to fight with people over it
u dont have to fight with every motherfucker who says some ignorant or passive aggressive shit on ur posts. just block them. they can be wrong all by themselves.
I feel like asian people are constantly limited (esp. in western cultures) because a lot of us cannot be ourselves without nonasian people either fetishizing us or making fun of us. Asian teenagers, and mainly asian girls, can’t wear their fucking school uniform without western people thinking it’s “sexy” when those people are usually underage. Asian people can’t enjoy cultural foods without condesending people making rude comments like “omg is it dog meat?!?!?!” Asian people’s hard work is brushed off almost always. We can’t even play the characters made to represent us, the roles are always given to a white actor. Don’t get me started on how our languages are always seen as just some cutesy lines and squiggles that are “aesthetic. And people who are Indian, Malaysian, Arab, Native Russian, or from a country that isn’t China/Japan/Korea are ALWAYS excluded when people talk about Asia. I’m sick of that. Asian people deserve to exist without being fetishized or mocked.
ways i have tricked people into thinking i am competent:
bought a really nice looking fountain pen
that sounds like a joke but fountain pens are cheap as shit and when you use one people look at you like you’re a fucking wizard
this hero 901 cost me $3 on ebay and i don’t know why people assume that this is a pen for intelligent people but they do
it works better when i am using a nice notebook and not the avengers notebook that makes it look like the hulk is grabbing my sweet pen
i write in code which for some reason leads everyone to assume that i am some kind of da vinci motherfucker, instead of the reality, which is that i am writing about dicks and don’t want anyone to know
it looks like i am constantly taking notes on everything which is both intimidating and inaccurate, just the way i like it
i bought a usb clicker/laser pointer for $11 and now it seems like i’ve got this shit on lock, like i am so pro at giving presentations i even own accessories
holding a clicker makes you seem at least 10% more like you know what you’re talking about i’m pretty sure
i check the weekly freebies on creativemarket every monday so now i have a huge folder of pro-looking website themes and powerpoint templates and fill-in-the-blank resumes (also a lot of autumnal clipart and watercolor flowers and script fonts but that is less relevant)
i bought a ceramic coffee mug at world market years ago and it makes me look like a productive coffee-drinker because no one knows it’s full of hot cocoa
i don’t know why drinking coffee makes you look busy it just does even though i’m pretty sure it statistically reduces productivity
bonus: not only does no one know i’m just drinking Depression Chocolate but they think i am being Environmentally Conscious rather than Poor As Shit
extra bonus: i can take a sip whenever it looks like someone is going to ask a question and then they ask someone else
i almost never have to answer questions and i leave the room a lot because i have to pee constantly so double extra bonus
“That’s a very good question, and one that deserves an in-depth answer, so if you’d like to leave me your card I’d be happy to discuss it with you later one-on-one” aka “how DARE you suggest i waste everyone’s time answering this question right now” aka “lmfao i have no fucking clue what you just said please let me secretly google that okay”
bonus: now it seems like you are a sophisticated grownup who assumes everyone has A Card and if they have to settle for writing their email on a scrap of paper you can feel smug about it even though in your heart you know that you are no better
i’ve got anxiety and poor impulse control and anxiety about my poor impulse control so i generally say jack shit about shit and this constant silence is often misinterpreted as aloof observation
no one knows that my air of mystery is actually a bad case of the shy and i am too shy to correct them so it works out
when i’m on my laptop and i don’t want anyone to notice how much i’m dicking around i turn the brightness way down so they can’t snoop without being obvious
at least one window of notepad++ with some random html page or css stylesheet in it makes randos assume you are some kind of genius doing some genius shit, unless they are CS major randos, in which case i guess find an intimidating looking excel spreadsheet and hope for the best
It annoys tf out of me when adults (and ye if you’re 20 ur an adult) get offended when you call cartoons intended for a young audience as children’s cartoons. Like listen….just because it’s good and you like it doesn’t make it not what it is, especially if you’re gonna be shitting on actual kids over it
Don’t brony the things you love just because you love them. Kids cartoons can be awesome but they’re still kids cartoons
lance: alright keith. this is our moment of truth. this is what we’ve been training for. this is our everest. this is our destiny. and we will not fail. are. you. ready?
keith: (nods determinedly)
lance: hunk, are you prepared to serve as our witness?
there are a lot of funny scenes from brooklyn 99 on tumblr and those are all great but this is the only three seconds you need to see to finally convince you to watch this show
reckless & terribly gay 